Lesson 2

Men by nature aren’t that detail focused. In fact, they’re quite content to just drift through their lives thinking about cars, football, pizza and porn. But much like his waistline, a brain not whipped into shape will soon turn flabby and that brilliant mind you once hooked up with could end up being more Homer than Aristotle. His mind should be sharp, attentive and completely and utterly focused on you.

So get in early and train your man to notice the details that are important to you. Reinforce that failure to notice these things will result in unspeakable hardship and cruelty. Done right, your man will soon notice not only your new hair cut, but your new dress, freshly manicured hand and more importantly when you drop a pound or two (of course under punishment of death he will never ever ever notice should you gain a luxury pound or two).

And if he fails to notice that quarter inch taken off your bangs, then slap him down quick smart with your weapon of choice, a cold stare, an emasculating sigh or pull out the big knockout combo of the silent treatment mixed with reminders that “nothing’s wrong”. This kind of mental torture will have him wracking his brains for a. what he has missed and b. how to make things better.

Eventually he will obediently take note of all the wondrous minutiae of your life. He’ll sit and listen to your whole day, remember the names of all friends, family and passing acquaintances and if well trained willingly sit and watch all your favourite TV shows (and even make intelligent conversation on the plot points).

So get his brain thinking. And get it thinking about you. A haircut with just a fraction taken off is a nice place to start.